ROB ME OF ME. (2012) is a project written, produced and performed by Glenn Lutz. It's an abrasive and robust hip hop album full of dark synths, grinding electro riffs and brash drums patterns. Samples range from Heath Ledger to James Brown, and reverb induced bells ring over moody instrumentals that add to the album's overall extremist nature. The lyrical content ranges from thoughts of suicide, to what Michael Jackson would sound like as a rapper. It's a bold take on rap and electro, and is presented as an art piece exploring topics such as ego, insecurity, abuse, mental disorders and religion.
ROB ME OF ME. (An Essay by Glenn Lutz)
I'm grateful to be alive today, when for so many years, I wished that I wasn't. Life isn't perfect, but the journey has taught me to be positive in negative times, and to always keep going. I made the choice to find the good in any situation, and that way of thinking has changed my life.
For years, I've battled with depression. I always felt I wasn't enough, and my unique upbringing added to identity issues. Being half German and half Haitian, I didn't fit in, and as the only mixed child in a large family, I found myself confused and wanting to disappear. I was also an actor, Boy Scout, spelling bee champion, award-winning artist, pianist, honor roll student, athlete, black belt, vocalist and theater performer, all while battling an unexplainable inner sadness. As a teenager, that depression landed me in therapy, the hospital, jail, five high schools, a boarding school, a military school, in addition to a drug habit and self-imposed seclusion from family and friends.
After years of pain, I found myself smoking two packs of cigarettes a day, weighing 265 pounds, living as a functioning alcoholic, while working my "dream job" as a recording engineer. I was angry, and wanted to express the pain that I felt every day as I looked in the mirror. I hated that I saw potential within myself. I knew who I could be, but it all felt so far away.
I found myself crying out to God to save me, and to essentially "Rob me of me." In the years to come, I would grow, but in that moment, I just wanted to be heard. I wanted to unleash that fire burning inside of me. I wanted to rid myself of the pain I felt. I began working on an album; writing lyrics and making beats that sonically felt the way I felt. I made about 25 tracks for the project, but I never released them. They were too negative, too raw, and so I continued to wear a mask. "What would people think?"
Now, at this point in my journey, I've decided to release 5 of the tracks as an EP. I think this project serves as an ode to will power, growth, change, waging war against negativity, throwing away excuses, deading mediocrity and losing self-pity. It serves as a testament to shaping yourself into the person who you want to be.
I find it fitting to release this EP on Halloween when we celebrate the "wearing of masks." This project is about ripping them off at a time when the curated image of us for social media reigns supreme. Let's be more honest with ourselves. Let's love a little more in these negative times. Let’s bring light to every situation.